I’m a girl

November 13, 2012 — 13 Comments

Something has been on my mind this week and if you have read this blog for any small amount of time, you know that there are times when I have to write it out. Today is one of those days, so bear with me and I hope you can follow.

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I am a girl…I know, Quelle Horreur! Before you start breaking out the questions about whether or not I knew I was a girl or any great jokes which I’m sure you have :) , I’m going somewhere with this. Because I’m a girl, because I’m a mom, I have a specific perspective on life. I have a set type of emotions, feelings, outlook, etc. that God gave me inherent to being a girl. But if you look at the commenters on my blog, they are mostly g

Now guys, please hear me…I love my guy readers! They sometimes have a different perspective on things I write about than I do and a few of them have become personal friends. And I don’t want to lose them as readers and commenters. (So don’t leave guys!) But all week, I’ve been thinking, “I need more women readers and commenters on my blog.”

Growing up I always had more guy friends than girl. Now that I am older and I’ve been able to look back on my life, I think it’s because guys don’t judge like women do. Women can be vicious and cruel, they can judge each other harshly, sometimes even before they really know the other person. Since I moved place to place almost every two years while growing up (Air Force brat), I didn’t have much time to develop deep relationships, especially with other girls. But now that I am older, and a mom, I realize that I need more Godly women in my life. I need to try to surround myself with more female perspective. God created us for connection…Not just the connection of a husband and wife, as in the case of Adam and Eve, but also in friendship, as shown in Ruth and Naomi, Mary and Elizabeth, etc. And as Grown Up Girlfriends puts it, “women crave relationships innately and are driven to be in relationships in a way most men do not fully understand”.

So, how do I get more female readers and commenters? I’m not sure. I’ve had this blog for just over three years now and still the majority of my commenters (since I don’t know how to track gender of readers) is male. How do I engage the women who read these posts? How do I draw them in so we can form a community of women who share each other’s struggles? I’m honestly not sure of these answers yet, but I feel this is something I need to figure out, with God’s help.

April

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13 responses to I’m a girl

  1. I really dont have an answer BUT keep trying,I wish to find more godly women in my life.As I have grown into whom I am I have had to make some life changing decisions with my external family(parents,brothers and sister inlaw)they have chosen an different path than I want my children to go down and even though i try to fit them into our lives they choose to hurt us.

    this is a great post,i love when others say it how it really is,

    • I’m sorry to hear of your struggles but rest assured, if we seek to do His will, He will honor it.

      And as for saying it like it is, I wish more people would, then maybe we really would and could be there for each other more often!

  2. Perhaps your lack of “girl” friends is God’s way of protecting you from the cruelty and viciousness you describe.

    God knows what we need and what we need reaches far beyond what we desire.

  3. That’s interesting because it seems like the majority of bloggers are women? I have a friend named Audra. She is married, a mother of three and she helps lead worship at our church. She also is a writer and has helped me with some of my manuscripts and queries. She has a great heart and I think you two would hit it off, after all, you’re sisters in Christ.

    http://audrakrell.wordpress.com That is her site. Stop over there and reach out to her. Please mention that I recommended it, and be straight forward with her. She’ll be a great asset.

    Yeah… I’m a little hurt… Just kidding! I love you’re honesty and pure heart. It’s what makes you – you!

    • I think the last statistic I saw was that bloggers, male vs. female, were almost half and half which I found interesting. Thanks for the info on Audra, I will check out her site and get in touch.

      As for you…I always love to hear your thoughts and ideas, even if I want to have more women come around too! :) Thanks for the kind words

  4. April,

    I hear you!!! Growing up was the same for me…more guy friends. Even now it’s easier to chat it up with guys. I do have some awesome woman friends in my life…unfortunately, now that we live in a different state…they are so very far away. I am having trouble developing deeper relationships with women in this new land we find ourselves in. I guess I’m back to my growing up days…although I really desire a woman close by that I can have coffee with and chat with. I’m praying about it…and I believe God will bring the exact woman in my life that I need. You are not alone my dear. :) And here I am…a woman commenting on your blog. ;) hehe

    • Sounds like we’ve been in the same boat, Darlene. I hope that God leads you to some amazing friends in this new chapter in your life. And thank you for coming by and commenting! It’s nice to have a female perspective. :)

  5. Maybe the guys commenting is what turns women off. They’re afraid to be as open with guys around as they would be with just women.

    Or they don’t know what they’re missing in not engaging with you.

    • It’s possible, though I’m not sure that’s really it as it is all an open forum online for everyone to see anyway. Well, God will lead so it’ll work out one way or another.

  6. April…you are a wise woman to seek more women to have a relationship with through blogging. I decided to pick out several womens blogs to follow along with a couple of men. As much as I like the men comments I know I need a womans prespective also. We are created to think different on different levels then a man…we are usually more open with our feelings. For me, I would not call one of my blogging men for a talk but I have developed a relationship with a couple of women who I have and would again call for advice on an issue I would not blog about.

    On the other hand you have gained a respect from the men which speaks highly of you. You must have a deep respect for men that shows up in your comments and post. I for one enjoy your comments and your post. I do not always comment on all blogs because of time. Maybe you could make quality and not quanity the focus of getting women bloggers. When I do come to your site I find wisdom, courage and a deep love of the Lord and people. You are needed in our blogging world. Blessings.

    • Betty, you have no idea how much I needed to hear your words today. Thank you greatly for them. It is good to know that even when people can’t or don’t comment that they see what I try to put into each of my posts. God bless you!

  7. I don’t think any of us who blog seriously no matter if it’s every day or once a week or occasionaly do it without giving our words much thought. I read somewhere that bloggers are usually not as good as they write themselves to be so you cannot have a deep relationship. And I am sure that is true to an extent. But in our quick and easy communications world face to face relationship do not go deep either. Besides the deepest realtionship we should have is with the Lord then our blog words will be fueled by the Spirit. If it is well with my soul then it is well what I write. The bloggers I read and share with are ones I have checked out…you check out my sister. One time I took a whole four or five hours and read different blogs…looking for ones that resonated in my heart. I wanted to find a blogging family of mixed comments with the underlying theme of God is truth. I only think the devil can get in when we wander aimlessly in the blog world.

    The reason I am commenting again is I stopped by to see if you had posted again…I will be back…I am blessed that I blessed you with my comments. You made my day sister. Blessings

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